


Sober II

by MistyNini



Category: 2gether (Band), Thai BL - Fandom, brightwin - Fandom, sarawatine - Fandom, เพราะเราคู่กัน | 2gether: The Series (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Slice of Life, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:20:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25826557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistyNini/pseuds/MistyNini
Summary: Win knows Bright, knows him like the back of his hand, knows the tiniest mole hiding under his left ear, has caressed the scars they share above the right eyebrow and has explored the canvas of his body. He has the sound of Bright's soft moans replaying in his mind, knows by heart the difference between his laughs of happiness and of hurt, imprints the way Bright moves above him as sweat drips down his neck letting out sweet surrenders, anticipating the warmth as he enters him because he would yearn for this all day.But when Bright leaves after a fuck, all Win is left with is the longing to see how angelic Bright would look under the morning sun.
Relationships: Bright Vachirawit Chivaaree & Win Metawin Opas-iamkajorn, Sarawat Guntithanon/Tine Teepakorn
Comments: 10
Kudos: 101





	Sober II

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Twitter moots who encouraged me to finish this.](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Twitter+moots+who+encouraged+me+to+finish+this.).



> Hello, this Zoey and this is practically my first fic on ao3 and for the brightwin/sarawatine fandom. I do hope you enjoy, and it'd be great if I could get some feedbacks from y'all :)

Its the smokes after the fucks and the conversations that follow that started it. This whole charade of pretending to be someone you're not. Win takes another wet wipe from the table besides the bed to clean himself, he sees Bright putting on his Tshirt from the corner of his eyes, he himself is still stark naked, dirty linens lying around him. He doesn't feel the need to cover himself, not when this has been routine for the past five months.  
He reaches to the drawer and pulls out a pack of Black Marlboro throwing them over to Bright along with a lighter. "I'll join you, let me just grab a quick drink," he adds.  
He takes an extra bottle of beer from the fridge just in case Bright also wants one. Barefooted, exhausted and still a little bit high from their previous activity, Win heads towards the balcony where he sees the other already sending up gray smokes out into the open, leaning his bulky body onto the frail railings of Win's condo, chestnut hair drenched in sweat moving back and forth due to the light breeze only a tenth storey apartment would get.  
"Hey...", Win calls, "Want one?", he gestures the extra bottle to Bright who takes it with a nod of thanks.  
They stand in silence. 'I don't want to think', that was what Bright had said to Win the first time they did what they are doing now. And Win complied. He don't ask questions and he has never really felt the need to either.. until two months earlier. That was when he started to realise.  
"What is the schedule for tomorrow?", Bright asks, "I forgot my phone in the car and haven't really been updated."  
"Its another advertisement shoot." Win replies. So tonight they're keeping it there, he thinks. He isn't really hurt though, work related conversations has been most of their conversations ever since they had been partnered a year ago, and even on rare nights when Bright would let down a layer of his exterior, it would somehow always revolve back to work. That has been how it is and he knows. Yet there is a part of him that wants deeper conversations and a meaningful relationship with this man beside him that he has learnt to bury.  
Win sharply inhales the smoke that burns his throat, he could feel it slowly killing his organ every time he brings the cigarette to his lips and the smoke spirals off his mouth. Ironic because that is exactly how he feels every time Bright comes over and the leaves, it was just as harmful to his body.  
Win puts on a smile, like he does every day, its his job to make people happy and to say he is a great actor would be an understatement because he feels like he has been acting all the damn time.  
"Carpool?" Bright asks, shaking Win out from his inner world.  
"Oh.. yeah sure. I'll pick you up." he waves a hand. 'Cool' he heard Bright mutter as he stamps out the last bit of the cig on the railing and throwing it in the dustbin.  
"Why are you so quiet tonight?", again it was Bright asking, and Win smiles.  
"Why are you so inquisitive tonight?" he asks back, a hint of tease in his tone.  
Bright snorts, taking another sip of the beer. "Its unlike you," he says, "You always have something to say."  
"Hmm.. maybe tonight I don't."  
"Relationship troubles?"  
Win actually laughs out loud at that, "You're good." It was funny to him that Bright was asking him this when they fuck literally minutes ago, spends most of their time together at work, where would he have the time to think about any relationship with any other people. But of course he wouldn't know this, Bright has never been interested in what he does or thinks, he takes in what Win tells him and leaves it at that, not asking more, not curious about his life.  
"I'm not as popular with the ladies as you are," Win quickly adds, Bright stays quiet.  
"Trouble on your side?", he asks, surveying Bright's conflicted expression.  
"Not anything serious, no. The usual. She thinks I don't spend enough time with her and shit."  
"you don't."  
" Well yes, but I’m busy working.."  
"even now?"  
Bright lick his lips, he must've felt they were getting dry, "everyone else thinks so, so yeah...why not. We're spending time to get closer aren't we?", he looks at Win as he speak. Win could feel the indifference in the eyes staring at him, to him it was too much. If this was anywhere else, if it was under lightings and fifty people staring at them, if there was a camera directed at them, if this was scripted... he wouldn't have felt one damn thing but it was not. This was the raw Bright staring into his soul and as empty as the eyes are, it sparks a fire in him, so fiercely lit that he could feel pain in his chest, a burning sensation shoots up his cheeks and ears and all of a sudden he feels hot. He blinks fast and turns away .  
"y-yeah.. that’s what it is." His voice sounds so weak and he despise himself for the moment of weakness. He wonders if Bright catches on to that, any one would have to be clueless to not have seen how flustered Win was. He clears his throat. "we're a lot closer now... "  
Too close, skin to skin close, feeling every inch of each other's body close and feeling the inside of the other's body close.  
"Right..", Bright pulls a towel from the hanger, " I have to go so I'm taking a shower and then I'll be off," he gives a light pat on Win's shoulder and strides in.  
I can't do this anymore, Win thinks as takes in a deep tired breath, he knows he has to stamp out this fire sparking inside of him before it could get any bigger...before it burns his body whole.

To say Win hasn't had feelings for another man before would be wrong, however he has never been in a relationship with one. He reciprocates flirty comments and kiss a crush maybe once in college but it had never been more than that, he was scared. He did not really understand what comes after that, how their relationship would progress and that has always stopped him from taking things any further with a man. But things were different with Bright. With Bright , it was easy. Perhaps it was because of all those months of acting like actual lovers on screen, kissing and hugging each other that makes Win comfortable in his relationship with Bright. It was never anything more than work or being business partners.  
Comes March and it was the last night of filming the series. Win could feel the bittersweet feelings each staff that worked on set has, and the sad but relieved atmosphere that night of having to say goodbye to nearly a year long project and also to finally getting rest.  
He saw Bright taking out his phone and taking videos of the moment. He was watching everything happening, leaning on the run down bus from the set and taking in the midnight air, exhausted and more sad than he would like to admit.  
It was then that Bright came up to him with a camera and before Win could react clicked a picture. They smiled at each other as Bright came over to stand beside him.  
"So.. its the last night."  
"Yeah.."  
"How do you feel?"  
"kind of empty?" Win replied, looking up at the stars. Bright nods in agreement.  
"That happens. I guess I feel the same."  
Win turned to look at Bright and the scene before him took his breath away. The other's side profile barely lit up by the set's lights far away mixing in with the other worldly pale moonlight resting on top of his lines was a sight anyone could fall in love with. Win has always known Bright to be a beautiful man and had blushed on more than one occasion when they had to film or do shows as a couple but would always brush it off because he guessed it would be natural to feel that little bit of something for a partner you're assigned to in the industry. Of course he was new, he didn't know it was not normal. Co actors don't just feel things for each other, they are all professionals. And when Win knew of it, he convinced himself it was because this was his first ever project and that the lightheaded feeling would eventually fade as the series end.  
But that night, as he look at this person standing beside him, Win realised he didn't want the series to end, he didn't want to not meet this person everyday, he didn't want to end whatever it is that he is feeling for this man.  
And so that night at the closing party, when a very drunk Bright kissed him on the lips, Win kissed back. When Bright leads him into a hotel room, he locked the door behind them, when Bright entered him, he ignored the pain that surged through his body.. it was his first time and when Bright told him in the morning that it was a mistake, Win nods and said he himself was too drunk to remember. That first morning Bright left him sitting confused in a hotel room, Win remembered their interview a few days before when Bright asked him if he had ever lied to him and he answered No. He would have to change that answer now.

It was a few days later that Bright invited him over for a drink. Nervous would be an understatement, sure they've changed texts since then but they were all work related and they have had drinks in their rooms together before but this time, Win knows it was going to be different. He thought about what happened a lot, in fact, its the only thing on his mind and the unlimited free time he had right after did not help in the slightest. If he said he felt hurt, that would not be actually right, because it was only something as simple as physical attraction that made him do what he did that night and nothing more. Bright's reaction was only expected and so was his. As someone rational and logical, Win did the only thing he could think of, he shut off the part of him that was attracted to the other man.  
"Hey, come in." Bright was casual, wearing a large Tee with shorts and slippers. Win smiled, a bit nervous but firm about his resolution. And somewhere along the light chat and whipping up their simple dinner of cup noodles, the initial air of tension and awkwardness dissipates into that of familiarity and comfort. It was when they were both on the couch, a little tipsy, listening to the faint slow music playing and Win on the verge of falling asleep that Bright reached over and kissed him. A little voice in the back of his mind told Win he has to stop whatever it is that was happening right then. But his body took control and he reciprocates with a deeper kiss. He could feel Bright's hands slowly travelling up his thighs, the sensation felt good, his breath hitched and a moan escaped. Its been too long since was made to feel this good. The husky smell of their sweat and the lingering taste of the cherry wine made the experience all too heavenly for Win and when he felt the warmth of the other's inside, he could feel a sensation of pleasure tingling all over his body and on impulse thrust upward. Bright's deep moans and airy breaths above him as he continuously ride him made Win forget that this was probably Bright's first time taking it in. It was in a moment of haze filled with lust that Win turned their position and began to mercilessly thrust inside the other, he could see Bright scratching his thighs with his long nails as tears trickle down his face but they were both too clouded by veils of intense satisfaction and ecstasy that pain was ignored.

"Does this change anything between us?", Win asked, his forehead drenched in sweat and strands of hair sticking all over . He looked at Bright who was closing his eyes, flinching every now and then and Win realised. He could not move the entire day either the last time they did it and he was on the receiving end. "I'm sorry, does it hurt a lot?", he got up and head to the bathroom to get some pills with water and take it to Bright.  
"Do you want it to?",  
"What?"  
"Change things between us?", Bright asked back, gagging a little as he swallow the bitter pill.  
Win hesitated. "I don't want anything to change," It was Bright who said it, " our friendship before this.. or this."  
"I don't understand." Win replied, genuinely confused at whatever Bright was proposing.  
"Lets think of it as a part of our work."  
When Win left that day, he left with confusion and maybe a bit of relieve. He was glad there were no feelings involved, he was admittedly more than satisfied with the sex, though they would have to be more gentle next time, their work the next day would suffer. His mind stopped at the thought of the 'next time' and he wonders if the said proposition was too weird and even though both of them admitted to have no feelings whatsoever for each other, what would happen if that begins. He was thinking a million things at once, fidgeting and worrying because he had never had casual sex, he had always been a decent man. All that thought turned to nought, for after that day it has always been so easy - it would be after photoshoots in one of the empty rooms, or after simple dinner and after parties with the crew. They were having a good time the both of them, enjoying the success they're blessed with and simultaneously have an active sex life.

Win had it all under control, the sliver of attraction he’d felt that one night neatly swept under the rug. The thrill of the secret sex life he shares with Bright and the satisfaction he gets from the highs of their actions have managed to keep any underlying feelings he might have had closed off. Of course, that never went away, its there... just shut away.  
He and Bright shares many things and as distant and cold and indifferent as Bright is, he is the closest person to Win for the time being. Bright doesn’t really speak about his true feelings; the nights when they would converse, Win knows the way the other would skim around deep topics and anything that has to do with heart to heart talks. And yet Win understands. When Bright would prefer a bottle of water to a beer, he understands that the other is alright mentally, at least for the night. Some nights, he would smile as he lay on the bed and talk about what he would like to do in the future. Some nights would just be Win talking about his worries and Bright would listen, not saying a word but his presence gives off a sense of comfort. Other nights, it would be Bright trying to coerce him into getting into a relationship and Win silently shrugging it off.  
"You haven't been in a relationship since we knew each other.."  
"I prefer it that way.." Win would reply.  
"But don't you feel lonely?"  
"You're in one and I know you still feel lonely."  
"So?"  
"So why does it matter.. I'm alright like this." Win shrugged.  
"Like this." Bright muttered, "You mean you're satisfied enough with what we do?"  
Win nods.  
"I guess the sex I provide's too good huh.." Bright teased. Win playfully nudged him back and things were alright.

It seemed alright except these small and seemingly insignificant exchanges were starting to crack the layers that Win shoved down in his heart. Each time Bright does something as trivial as smile in his way, adjust the blanket before he leaves, gives him rough pats, or give passing compliments, the layers thins.. slowly but surely and Win has been too caught up in everything to notice. Win didn't notice the way he would get shivers and get turned on when Bright slips in words like 'beautiful' and 'pretty' during their activity, he didn't notice the way his ears would pick up the slightest moans coming off the other's mouth as he thrust into him, didn't notice how his lips would curl seeing Bright's satisfied smile as they both ride in their highs.

It was on the hot month of June that reality comes crashing in for Win.

It was not in the middle of the night when they would push and pull, rolling naked on the bed. It was not even during conversations nor when they were alone. The sun was brilliantly shining on them that day, it was like any other day when Win was on a family day out. Him and his family were out shopping around the local market place. He is wearing a loose black shirt with simple khaki pants, sunglasses shielding him from the unyielding sun rays. He could see his sisters picking out local made bracelets, his mother and father chatting away and his brother sitting across him slurping in the fruit slushes. There was nothing extraordinary about that day, but as Win sat there, taking in the scenery, he saw from the corner of his eyes the chestnut hair he had been so used to and look immediately. Standing a bit far off, Win could see Bright smiling widely, his arms wrapped around his mother and posing for the camera held by his uncle. He saw how genuinely happy the other looked and just like that he realises he wants to be the one on the receiving end of that smile, that happiness. Realisation dawns on him as he continue watching the other man in front of him, he wants to love him and be loved by him.  
Before he could compose himself Bright saw him and wave a small wave with a tight lipped smile, and Win waved back. Their families chat a bit before they all went their way. The day went by gay and merry, but Win was anything but happy, he knew what the consequences of accepting this feeling would mean, he was going to get hurt but he also knew there was little he could do about it. And so began the days of constant lying and acting, of habitually swallowing in bitter tears of jealousy when Bright comment about his relationship, of enduring the thorns stuck in his throat as he tells the other it would be alright and that she is right for him, of waking up to an empty bed and tears pooling in.  
It takes a lot more than learning to ignore the flirty comments that the other would give him on social media and on-cam to actually stop feeling things for Bright, Win learns. He understand what he is doing to himself is harmful, he has been visibly getting thinner and everyday would be waves of unwanted feelings coming in at him for one moment he would feel elevated as Bright softly guides his back towards the reporters and another moment his heart would sink seeing the other on the phone, speaking with his girlfriend.  
"We're shooting a new season." It is the company Director speaking, "But I guess we've all been more or less prepared for it what with the success of the series."  
Both Bright and Win looks happy, it was not every day that a new season of a series is made, much less as fast as this. It is a huge achievement for the both of them and for the company as well. They barely have free time but they were happy to work, they were both admirable actors taking their work seriously.  
"We will be starting the script reading next week and plans to film by the next.." She goes on, listing out the hectic schedule planned for them. Win wonders when, amidst all those schedules, would he have time to talk with Bright. It dawns on him that even though they are practically together all the time, they never really have serious conversations, and the only intimate talks are the ones after the sex. It make sense to Win now, he figures he could have buried the feelings if he hadn't agreed to the stupid friends with benefit relationship.  
"...Win, are you listening?", Bright nudges him and Win breaks out of his thought.  
"You seem to zone out a lot these days, you okay?"  
"I'm fine..", he replies, shifting his attention back to the meeting.

"Are you seriously fine though?", Bright asks him again as they head back towards the practice room. I'm finee..", Win gives what he hopes is a reassuring smile, "I just couldn't get much sleep last night." He could see that Bright didn't really believe him. "Really.. I'm okay." He says again.  
"You better be," Bright returns, softly messing Win's hair as he walks away. Win gulps as he stands there frozen in his spot. He can hear his heart beating erratically and as he rest his palm on it to calm it down, he prays no one witness his dazed face.  
Its been a week since he turned down Bright's offers with the excuse of feeling a bit under the weather. The truth is that Win finds himself falling deeper in love each passing day and this was not normal for him. He was afraid, more than anything that he would slip up and confess, and what if they were in an awkward position while doing so and what would Bright say. No, he was not going to risk anything, he would have to simply ask Bright to stop this ongoing thing between them which proves harder than he initially thought it would.  
"Can we talk?", Win says, leaning a bit closer to Bright while Green was reading his lines on the other side, "after this." Bright looks a bit surprised but replies with a nod.  
It has been a long day of script reading and the sun is sitting along the horizon, ready to set any time soon. They are standing on the roof top, witnessing the sun setting, the end of the day. Win has a cup of latte on his hands and Bright's hands were in his pocket, there is a light breeze that caters to the ambience.  
"You look nervous," Bright comments. "Are you in a relationship?"  
"What?", Win is taken aback, "wha- no.. no that is not it." He snorts a bit at the absurd thought.  
"Well I just," Bright looks quite abashed, scratching his head, " it seems so because you keep postponing.... things."  
"Yeah, about that," Win fidgets, his finger nervously tapping the cup.  
"You want to stop."  
Win nods.  
"I understand, is that what you wanted to say to me?" Bright ask.  
Win nods again.  
"Hmm.."  
Its when Bright heads back and Win is left standing alone that the tears starts trickling down. One by one they fall till all Win could see was smeary city lights and the dark sky merging in front of him. It is not so much the stopping the arrangement part but the way the other so easily agrees that hurts. To the other, it had been nothing more than sex, he knew, he knew so fucking well but to witness the indifference in person hurts him to the core.  
Win thinks he is getting by well enough, Bright doesn't treat him any different which he honestly don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing. Because the Bright he knows still pats him, still cares for him as a friend and looks out for him and for Win, every action creates in him feelings he wishes to kill. Its on the second week of filming that Win hears Bright broke up with his girlfriend. Again, Win is torn, a part of him strangely feels happy and he hates himself for it, while another part of him genuinely wants to be there for him, to console him and rid him of the pain he must have felt. After all, he'd heard about their relationship more than he would have liked to from Bright himself.  
"Would you like to come hang out later?", Bright asks him. They had just finished filming some of the more romantic scenes all day and Win is a bit flushed. "Alright," he agrees, smiling a bit too widely. You've got new furniture," Win comments, walking inside Bright's condo. The atmosphere seems to change he thinks but then he remembers the last time he came here and what ensued, making him clear his throat out of embarrassment.  
"Just bought them last week," Bright half shouts from the kitchen, "Had to clear up my head and well..", he looks around his space, " I guess this is the result." Win smiles, he could feel something different about the other but couldn't quite pinpoint what it is.  
"I have a new gaming console too, which is why I invited you over," He continues, sitting down on the sofa, "I hope you don't misunderstand me."  
Win shakes his head, "Oh no, no.. its alright. I know.."  
It was nothing more than gaming and making stupid commentaries, but Win has never felt so close to Bright as he does tonight. It all feels like everything happens in slow motion as he turns his head to look at Bright who was smiling widely and so child like, popping a popcorn into his mouth, his eyes trained to the screen before him and his hands busy with the gaming pad. Win once again finds himself lost in the other, his heart aches and he smiles for he has never felt so sure about his feelings for this man . He knows he would never be able to keep himself away from him, and if being there as a friend was enough to witness this angelic and happy version of Bright, then so be it.

Win can't help but notice the small changes in Bright. The way he carries himself looks lighter somehow and his conversations with others sounds softer in some weird way. They've been so much closer since that night and Win has been learning to be content in his new established friendship with Bright, he likes that he doesn't have to put up a happy face all the time around him, he likes that he can complain all he wants to him, he likes this completely new side of Bright he is allowed to witness, he simply likes the fact that he is with Bright and that is enough to make him happy for now. Win doesn't know when he will have his heart broken again, and he doesn't want to know. For now he was going to enjoy the time he has with him ...when he have him all to himself.  
There is something so cinematic about the way the year passes by, Win feels like he has lived more than one life with the way things have been escalating from one end to another. Its the end of November and the air's a bit chilly, he loves winter, not that it gets any cold in Bangkok but the absence of the sweltering heat replaced by the cool breeze floating feels refreshing. His toes curls in the sand as he watches the waves roll on top of one another, the full moon is proudly showing off its vibrant blue and the crowd under the sky were merry. Its the celebration of the crew and cast of the series for being nominated in most of the year end awards. The show had finished airing a few weeks back and its the first time in months they all get together again. As Win chugs down another glass of beer, he notice a familiar figure making his way towards him.  
"You doing good?," Bright comes up and sits on the empty beach bench near him, a bottle of beer in hand.  
"I'm good. you?," he asks back, shifting his stance and plopping down besides him. They have been getting a lot closer and to him, Bright has become a friend he doesn't ever want to lose. Bright simply nods. There is comfortable silence between them.  
"Will you be here after dinner? for the party?," Bright asks after a while.  
Win shakes his head, "Nah, I don't think I like parties much anymore."

"Wait up," It was Bright. Win has his car door opened and was about to drive home. "Would you mind me coming over?”. Win has never been able to say no.  
"How have you been?" They're sitting on the balcony and Win can't help but remember how different things had been months ago. Win answers honestly. There really hasn't been much going on, he has been taking a much needed vacation and most of his time is spent with family and friends.  
"How about you?"  
"I think I'm doing better," He says, "Its also why I came here.. Win, I really want to thank you."  
Win waves it off and snorts, "I'm not used to this side of you, its scaring me." He teased the other. It must be the alcohol in his system that makes him so tipsy and light headed, it could also be the fact that he has Bright in his apartment, sitting so close to him. "I've missed you." He thinks as he look at the man beside him.  
"She wants us back together," he hears Bright says, his voice sounds happy he thinks and he smiles. His head spins but he knows he is happy for Bright, he is glad, he doesn't really know what the other is saying anymore, he feels drowsy.  
"Hey...", that sounds a lot like Bright, "Hey.. are you awake?" that is Bright. Win opens his eyes and see the man staring down at him.  
"You kinda passed out, how much did you drink back there?,"  
Win feels a sharp pain in his head as he get up, he manage to swallow the pills handed to him. "A lot I think... were you here all night?"  
"You really didn't leave me any choice," Bright laughs.  
There is a lump stuck in his throat as Win fights back the tears. Barely awake and head splitting, he sees Bright sitting on his bed, the white rays of the early morning sun peeking in from behind his form. He had always wanted to see this. He had wanted it so badly and before he knows it, he reaches out and gently place the softest kiss on the other's plump lips. Afraid to open his eyes, Win stays still and his could feel his lips trembling, no longer brushing Bright's lip. He bites the inside of his lips, scared.  
He feels Bright placing his hand on his shoulder, his thumb barely caressing his skin, "I'm sorry I have to go, I can't right now.. I... " he hears him say before the sound of the door closing and the suffocating air fills the room. Win finally breathes. He's done it, and there is no going back.

Bright still feels the lingering warmth where Win's lips touch his own. He steps on the pedal, going faster to match the thoughts racing in his mind. He had never even thought of the possibility of Win having feelings for him and yet the kiss was real, he could understand how nervous the other was and how sincere that kiss felt, but there was too much to process and he had to get out of there, to clear his mind. He doesn't know why and how or when Win started to have feelings for him, but he is almost sure that he fell first and now as he loosen the grip on the stirring wheel, the fact that Win likes him too finally settled within him. He drives home, thinking about how he would confess back to Win.


End file.
